New Phase in My Life

What's Happening in my Life.....

2010-09-21T16:53:00.002-04:00

So, obviously we didn't move. My doctors wanted me to stay here to complete my treatments, so hopefully next year we can move. Lexington now has bad memories for me. Having cancer has changed everything about this city.

I am more than halfway through my chemo treatments, then on to radiation treatments. I meet with the Radiologist on October 7 to discuss my treatment plan.

After that 2 more surgeries and hopefully I can put the whole cancer thing behind me.

I can handle the constant feeling of fatigue but I can't handle the not being able to work. I am only getting half on my normal pay and it is not enough. It is really getting to me.

Tony has his surgery on Sept. 30 and after recovery we are hoping he can find a decent job and ease the financial woes we are facing.

Next.......

2010-07-25T09:47:00.002-04:00

Started chemo on July 19th and was ok until the next day :) Now it seems as though every side effect that can happen is happening. I am so ready for this to be over with and I still have 5 treatments to go. I feel like I am defined by this disease. I am no longer Claire, I am the lady with cancer. It really sucks.

Good News!

2010-06-11T13:49:00.002-04:00

So far things are going great. Surgery went well, now just waiting to heal and then facing the next step.

Plans for moving are going full speed ahead. Just have to find the perfect place in Charleston and away we go.

The Dreaded "C' Word

2010-05-29T21:11:00.002-04:00

Yes, the dreaded Breast Cancer has found me. Just found out about 3 weeks ago and am still trying to digest it all. I will be having a double mastectomy on Tuesday, June 1. Kinda scary but I have faith in God and His plan so I am ok with it.

BETTER NEWS: I got married May 25th!!

That is the most awesome thing going on in my life right now. I totally believe that God sent Tony to me to help me get through all that is happening. He is absolutely wonderful.

Such a marshmallow

2009-11-22T13:32:00.003-05:00

It's been months but not until now have I felt the urge to write here. I wish I could just put all of it here for everyone to see, but that is not politically correct. I hate that term. I like being incorrect. Doing crazy and daring and even risky things. Why is that so bad? I feel as though everything that I like or want is wrong.

I feel like Claire, the Destroyer. How fast can I cause everything and everyone around me to crash and burn. Maybe I should try harder, at being bad. LOL Don't really think I need to try all that hard. it just finds me. I might hide.

Work Work Work

2009-08-12T21:42:00.003-04:00

Yay! So I changed positions at work and am once again a Department Manager. I have been given Health and Beauty Aids at my Walmart. This should prove to be my most challenging department ever. As fast as I put it on the shelf, someone is grabbing it up. It will certainly keep me busy.

Jessie started high school today and when asked how it was, "good" was the answer I got. Her outfits are planned for the rest of the week already.

Glenn has a couple of days of work left, then we start getting his stuff together and packed and ready to move him into the dorm at NKU. I am very excited for him. I am sure that I will miss him a little bit.

New Moon LOL

2009-08-04T20:06:00.002-04:00

hmmm something strange happened there and my post went bye bye. This is my new color, out with the pink

Yikes!!!!!

2009-08-04T19:35:00.003-04:00

Jessie started a blog so I thought that I would take a look at mine and it scared me. Not sure what kind of mood I was in when I did this but it is going to change. LOL I am hoping that this will become a habit again. I miss sharing my bizarre world with my zillions of readers.

Update...Update...whatev

2009-01-24T16:18:00.002-05:00

It's been awhile for my poor, lonely readers so I thought I would make this all pretty for V-Day! The same ol' stuff is happening around here. Glenn is doing college planning stuff. He wants to go to Northern and I am hoping he does. Not! Might be a little quiet with him gone.

Hi Dad! Hope your weather is a lot nicer than what we have here. We are going to try and invade your space for spring break. I hope. Things at work have gotten a little strange lately and not sure what is going to happen. I love you and Madoo!

This makes me happy

2008-10-18T13:28:00.000-04:00

couldn't resist the Dark Knight

So........

2008-10-18T11:26:00.001-04:00

I was all set to re-do, re-mangle, re-whatever and then had computer problems. So, now back to computer and may just re-do my blog.

Hold on to your Hats........

2008-08-21T18:46:00.005-04:00

I feel a blogger attack coming on. I think it may be time for me to change, update, mangle, and/or add all sorts of junk to my blog. Keep watching who knows what will happen. Feel free to make suggestions.

Dad, if you are reading this Hi!!! I love you!

Woot!

2008-07-26T09:12:00.002-04:00

Well, don't I feel special. LOL I have more readers than I thought. I don't have time right now to do the blog that needs to be done, but just felt compelled to put some words up here.

I am seeing a new doc about my diabetes and going to a couple of diabetes education classes to get a refresher on carb counting and insulin and all that. I plan on re-attacking this stupid disease.

Work is work. Made it through inventory and all that goes with it.

The kids are being kids. Glenn is working almost every day and Jessie is sleeping every day. I talk to the cats most times. We did add another Guinea Pig to the zoo. Reese Cup Reynolds is now enjoying kitchen time with Spyder Pig and Mimzi the rabbit. Jessie wants baby pigs. I say NO!

I am counting down the days to a mini vacation in Gburg. It will be nice to get away for a few days.

The painting and flooring project is moving along slowly. Apparently nothing gets done unless I am right there directing traffic. It really sucks. Big time. I want to move but the kids want to move with me. That sucks too. Just kidding. Glenn still wants to be a Marine but I think he wants to go to college first.

I am wandering off now. I have pulled the sewing machine out of the closet and am going to see what happens.

I'm Alive

2008-07-11T17:53:00.002-04:00

Just for those two people out there that read this, I am alive. Ok all kidding aside, I am so tired all of the time it is a huge effort just to read my e-mail let alone write on here. Work is crazy. Inventory is next wednesday so people are acting crazy. I get the joy of working tomorrow, my day off. Glenn has a Marine recruiter coming to chat tomorrow. My feelings are very ambivalent about this. I would be proud of Glenn but I want him to go to college first. We will see how the meeting goes. Jessie is talking of a Military career too, but as a photographer. Not too worried about her yet, she is only 13.

Surprise!!!!

2008-06-13T15:30:00.002-04:00

OK no real surprise, just a quick thought as I sit here procrastinating. I need to get the upstairs painted but can't seem to get anyone who lives in this house to help. So I was thinking that God really loves surprises. It is like a birthday party everyday for Him, just when you think that you made it safely in the front door He jumps out of the closet and yells "Surprise!!" hands you a gift and then leaves. He already knows what is in it, and it is up to us on how we use the gift. Do we shove it in the closet and try to forget about it, or is it one of those gifts that can't wait, like the hot water heater blowing up or car trouble, something like that. I often wonder if He is laughing his head off as He watches us scurry around trying to make the right choices. I have become very apathetic, I make no choices just let it all happen and duck when it hits the fan. I must work on that and try to come back from that place and take charge of what I can and wrap the rest up in nice paper with a pretty bow and give it back to Him.

New Floor!

2008-05-11T16:00:00.002-04:00

Woo Hoo! The new wood laminate floor is down in the living room. I am soooooo excited it looks great and is fun to watch the cats take corners on it. They slide everywhere. We still need to install the pieces that go in the doorways to connect it to the linoleum in kitchen and bath and at the bottom of the stairs. The stair piece will not be going in for a while as I have naked stairs right now. We have decided on flooring for the whole upstairs so that all has to be done then the carpet for the stairs will go in. Here's a couple of pics, still have some boxes of junk to empty out before it is completely done.

For those of you curious about my recent health crap I will get around to it someday. ;)

Uber Excitement

2008-05-06T15:39:00.002-04:00

I am very jazzed right now cuz I have no carpet in my living room and on the stairs! My landlord is installing cherry wood flooring tomorrow and as the summer progresses he is re-carpeting the stairs and putting the wood flooring all upstairs. I love it! The painting has slowed down mainly due to the discovery that I have asthma. Sometimes breathing is important. I can't wait till it is all done and I can invite everyone over to see how cool my house looks now.

Right now my most pressing thought is what to do with all the junk upstairs. Each room has to be painted and then everything moved out of it to do the floor. For normal people that might not be so bad, for us aaaacccckkkkk!!!!!!!!!! The basement is full, not one more thing will fit down there and we could fill a large moving truck just with what is upstairs. It will be quite a challenge. I am going to try to become a minimalist. Toss everything that I have not used in a year then move down to the 6-month cut off. Should be fun.

Insurance is Ridiculous

2008-05-01T16:08:00.002-04:00

As many of you know Glenn got his license and is happily driving everywhere. So I had to add him to my insurance. WOW! I had a certain insurance company that advertises on tv a lot as one that will give you instant coverage and won't cost a lot etc.............yeah right. They lied.

I was insured on two cars, one with full coverage and all that, no tickets, no accidents, $500 deductible and paying about $118 a month. I called and gave them Glenn's info and they said they would add him and I could call back to get rate, as they had to run a motor vehicle report on Glenn. I forgot about it till I got the bill yesterday. They wanted $478.45 per month to insure him.

Now, most of the people that I know can't afford that much for insurance a month including me. Some of my friends pay close to that in rent. I told Glenn that I guess he wasn't driving anymore.

Well, just by God's wisdom, Glenn and I had stopped in at a local car dealer and he had mentioned this insurance company in Nicholasville that was pretty good. So I called them today and spoke to Hunter. Within 30 minutes I had new insurance same deductible, and renters insurance for only drumroll please $214 per month. Do the math.

Glenn is happy cuz he gets to keep driving.

I am happy cuz I can afford it.

Construction Zone

2008-04-30T18:19:00.002-04:00

Yes once again I am changing my blog cuz I got tired of the other one. Sadly, my links all went bye bye so I have to add them back which I will......some day.

So I want to post but don't have much to say right now. Still working on painting seeing as after we finished the downstairs I didn't feel like painting anymore.

I am looking forward to June and camping at Mammoth Caves with Kelly. Should be another exciting adventure as stuff always seems to happen to us when we go places together. I would also like to take a train ride, not sure why, just sounds fun.

I found out that I have asthma because I couldn't breathe and went to the doctor and they asked "how long have you had asthma?" my response was I don't to which they replied, "well you do now." That was really no fun at all.

My daughter and I are going to have a serious Come to Jesus type of talk or I may have to send her to someone elses house to live for a while. I did assure her though, that as much as we are fighting that I still love her and that we will get through this. It helped.

For those who are keeping count, the zoo is now full: 3 cats, 1 Guinea Pig, 1 Bunny, 1 Cockatiel, 2 Teenagers and 1 ex-husband. I think that is more than enough.

Oh just got a car insurance bill and I told my son that he is not driving anymore. I can pay insurance and rent and nothing else or I can pay rent, food and utilities. Crazy stuff.

I gots stuff to do so I will leave ya'll here.

2008-04-28T17:42:00.002-04:00

UNDER CONSTRUCTION AGAIN PLEASE BE PATIENT ;)

Vacation

2008-04-03T20:06:00.004-04:00

So I am on vacation but not really. Just took a week off got my kitchen painted and went to the Cincy museum and thats about it. I did go to the doctor and found out the pain I was having was an infection in my jaw. It is slowly healing but not back to normal yet.

Photos are : My kitchen, Glenn sitting outside museum, Jessie on the boat inside the museum, Jessie's new haircut, and my kitchen. Kitchen was dirty off white and is now bright yellow with bright white ceiling and trim. I love it.

By the way Jessie's hairstyle has a name. EMO haircut. LOL I think I will get mine cut like that too.

Not Really Leaving

2008-03-21T19:53:00.002-04:00

Sam is tired and possibly even sick and needs a break. I feel really gloomy but not like "stupid" gloomy. I just really could use with some sunshine. There is so much going on I don't even know where to start. So I won't. Yeah I know, you can yell at me later.

I am starting the Jessie Chevrefils (my Mom) Memorial Zoo, so far it has one Fat Cat, one Black Cat, and one Psychotic Cat, one Guinea Pig, and one Really Fast Rabbit. I believe we will be adding a bird next week. Feel free to come by and visit. Admission is free.

My landlord is generously supplying me with paint in many colors to make pretty my abode, and has even offered to install Cherry laminate flooring. I am excited. If you wish to come by and help paint I will feed you, and you can even chase the Really Fast Rabbit, also known as Mimzy, around the house.

I would love to ramble on but I must make room for a couch so that the Human Exhibit has a place to sit during Zoo hours.

PS Young Jessie got her braces off.

Post-A-Holic

2008-02-21T21:01:00.003-05:00

I have taken a bit of a break because I was becoming too attached to my keyboard. Some tidbits to ponder:

I pulled into my driveway today, Thursday, put my car in park and slid down the hill to the backyard. Mild anxiety as I was trying to get some traction, finally was able to back out of yard and able to park. I am wondering how I will get said car up the driveway tomorrow morning.

Funny/cute item of interest. Last Sunday Glenn and I went to lunch with Kelly and Noah at Surf's Up Grill, we love the chili cheeses fries. They have a wishing fountain in the middle of the restaurant so I offered Noah a penny to make a wish. He runs over to the fountain and starts talking then makes a wish and comes back with a big smile. Guess what I wished for, he tells us that he wished he was a grown-up. We smile, Kelly gets the "I won't ever let him grow up" look (LOL) and I remind Noah that if he is a grown-up that he can't use his cool new swing that his Mom made him. He looks at Kelly and she agrees, he then is asking for more money to make another wish. Runs over to the fountain, makes his wish and strolls back to the table to announce that he has wished for the first wish to not happen so that he can stay a kid. :)

We did manage to embarrass Glenn a bit by implying that he was Noah's Dad and not a very good one at that to the diners nearby. It's the small things in life that we enjoy.

Before we left Noah asked to make another wish, this time he wished that he and Glenn would become brothers. Kelly and I looked at each other chuckling, and I then suggested that she could marry my ex-husband and that got several resounding NO!s from the table. I'm telling you, it's the little things.

Freaks Rule! Geeks Drool!

ABCs for Laurie

2008-02-21T20:38:00.002-05:00

A- Attached or Single: Single but attached to children.
B- Best Friend: Kelly K.
C- Cake or Pie: Chocolate Cake.
D- Day of Choice: Sunday. I get to see my friends at church and take a nap.
E- Essential Item: VISA Debit Card
F- Favorite Color: Pink.
G- Gummi Bears or Worms: Mini Gummi Bears.
H- Hometown: Montreal, Canada but grew up in Rowland Heights, So. Cal.
I- Indulgence(s): #1 China Buffet.
J- January or July: January, my birthday is the 9th.
K- Kids: Glenn 16; Jessie 12 (less than a month 13).
L- Life is Incomplete Without: Jesus Christ.
M-Marriage Date: In the future, maybe.
N- Number of Siblings: One brother and two sisters.
O- Oranges or Apples: Oranges, apples are good too.
P- Phobias or Fears: I don't like heights and I worry about my kids and my friends too much.
Q- Quote(s): Love the sinner, hate the sin.
R- Reason to Smile: The people in my life.
S- Season: Spring.
T- Tag Six: Kelly, Misty, Carol, Betty, Nathan, Stephanie.
U- Unknown Fact About Me: I read romance novels.
V- Vegetarian or Oppressor of Animal: Oppressor.
W- Worst Habit: Taco Bell.
X- X-Ray or Ultrasound: Ultrasound, cuz you can see your heart beating.
Y- Your Favorite Food: Taco Bell.
Z- Zodiac: Capricorn.

Ah Kant Ceeeeee!!!!!!

2008-02-08T19:44:00.000-05:00

He he he So I am cooking dinner tonight,4th time in a week - new world record, and I decide to make French Toast and Bacon. We like bacon, no, we LOVE bacon. So I start cooking the bacon and getting the other stuff ready and doing the dishes. I know dishes tooooooo, a real Suzy Homewrecker, I mean Homemaker.

So I now have moved the bacon over to another burner and have the french toast on the front burner, (my stove has one large burner and 3 small-go figure) and have pulled the soy bacon out of the freezer for the vegetarian in the family, sent Glenn a text telling him food, when I look up as I walk into the kitchen and there is so much smoke that I am wondering why none of the smoke alarms have gone off. I open the kitchen window, Glenn walks in and asked if there was a plane crash, Jessie crawls into the living room to open those windows and I get the other kitchen window open and my eyes stop burning quite so bad. I look at the stove and realize that some of the grease from the meatloaf I made the other night had spilled down into the burner and I had a great smoke bomb going.

I also found out that soy bacon looks like Beggin Strips and may possibly taste like them too. Though Beggin Strips might be better. In the end I dip some soy bacon into bacon grease and it almost is edible, but defeats the purpose. Glenn won't even eat it. I think that I will feed the leftover of it to the cats as I have run out of cat food, again. I think they share it with the neighborhood or something.

So here is what I am getting at, most of you know that I have a tendency to spazz out at times. Sometimes I can't handle long stories or complicated family trees, my eyes glaze and I get stuck trying to figure out the logistics and then miss the point of the story. Work has been causing some spazzing and the stranger it gets there the less work I seem to accomplish. It took me all day today to get one bulletin board covered with fabric and 4 things stapled to it (ran out of staples, didn't want to go on sales floor to get more, ransacked 2 offices for staples, etc etc) by then it was lunch. 30 minute chat about the re-implementing of WM policies with the big boss, R, hence the reality that I think that I am allergic to the plastic that they make clear tongue rings out of cuz it hurts now under my tongue.

Asst. Manager gives me grief for not eating some of his chili. We had a chili lunch to raise money for a charity, so I had to then take a break and eat some of his chili, very spicy but good. So by now, it is about 2. Then we have to bluetooth ringtones to each other for a while. Harass a couple of managers then clear off my desk and voila! Time to go home. The point that I am trying to make is that is it wrong to grab someone by the shoulders and shake them while yelling "get to the point!" ??????

Stop shaking me.

Saturday Morning Edit: I left soy bacon on counter over night and the cats wouldn't even eat it.

Get Up!........hmmm OK, Why?

2008-02-03T16:04:00.000-05:00

The exchange went something like that in Church today.

Not sure where my mind was but I was somewhere when I hear Kelly telling me to "get up", I looked around saw a couple of people standing and started to stand up, then I look at her and ask why? She gets a look somewhat like mine and says "Gum, do you have any?" Of course, I can't stop laughing at that point, I tell her what I heard and she laughs and says, "You really would do anything I say?" I had to stop and think and realized that I guess so if it seemed logical.

That brought me to a whole conversation about trust with God. Yep, He and I are on a first name basis. I realized that since my salvation I have begun to trust people, not everyone, but slowly, realizing that not all are good and not all are bad. Long story there. Now I basically believe that all are good but we have to work at it. Back to trust, I trust in God. Period. End of story. Anything He asks I will do without question. I do trust Kelly, but I realized that when it came down to it I questioned her. I don't question God when He tells me to stand up, sit down or speak His truth. This last week was a tough one on me, I followed Trent's edict that we speak to people that we wouldn't normally, and Wow! I got more than I could deal with, and struggled until I thought what am I doing? I took it to God and He gave me the words to speak, and the peace that I needed or as Pastor preached today "rest." After that I felt like there wasn't a person I couldn't share with, of course that is another blog altogether.

Back to trusting people, we got home from Church and Glenn was on Yahoo! talking with Kelly and he tells me to check out his status on Facebook. He wrote that he was changing it cuz Kelly told him too. I found that quite amusing and had to explain it to him so he wouldn't think that I had finally gone over the edge.

God puts people in our lives for very unique reasons, some aren't so nice and some we can't imagine not being there.

I went looking for scripture to reflect what I was thinking today but I couldn't find what I was looking for, Kelly tried to help me, but I can't put into words what I was feeling.

"He has put a new song in my mouth — Praise to our God;
Many will see it and fear, and will trust in the Lord." Psalm 40:3

I think this is incredible!

"The Lord is my strength and my shield;
My heart trusted in Him, and I am helped;
Therefore my heart greatly rejoices,
And with my song I will praise Him." Psalm 28:7

I guess what I am getting at is that I was wondering "Is it ok to put our trust in other people or is that just reserved for God?"

Things that go Boom

2008-01-30T16:05:00.000-05:00

OK so I am not writing about anything that has anything to do with that title, just liked it. So much is happening but I just can't blog about it. I wish I could and just change names of those involved but I just can't do that. They would know and maybe feel a little violated. Needless to say, if you see me tonight at church, my shirt says it all.

I think I may turn it into a weekly thing, whatever shirt I wear will be connected to my blog, just like color co-ordinating ones clothes. I will match my blogs. LOL

I have had some amazing stuff happen this week, some has been overwhelming, some extremely comical, but all of it has been a God thing. I love that expression but maybe use it too much. This week things that have happened truly have been God things.

I can't wait to see everyone tonight and share the good stuff not to mention that I have almost the same feeling today that I had when I was saved. I truly feel the hand of God around me.
I feel like I am glowing and will bust wide open it is awesome!!

Listen to above clip

2008-01-24T21:54:00.000-05:00

This is just too hilarious. When Kelly found this I just had to add it to my blog. I love the game and that is almost the only reason I still have facebook. I like this blog and am very comfortable with it. Back to Scrabulous, Kelly was over one day and we were each on a computer within 10 feet of each other when my son asks me what we are doing. We were playing Scrabulous, and it went something like this:

Your turn.....oh man....oh....darn it won't fit....well that works....your turn.....yikes!..........is that a word?.......what does it mean?........well here's one...............your turn......

this continued for some time as we had 2 games going, then we had to start another cuz one was done......

☺ ☻

WooHoo!

2008-01-20T10:48:00.000-05:00

Kelly will be so proud of me. LOL After Hours of searching for the perfect template, I gave up and made my own. I converted this one into a three column and changed a couple of other things and I think it just might work. I am still trying to fix bottom element so my pics are totally centered. Glad I don't do this for a living, I really would lose my mind.

Under Construction

2008-01-20T00:27:00.000-05:00

at this time I am changing things up a bit so please hang in there.
This whole process has been a real pain in the butt.

HAHA

2008-01-15T19:26:00.000-05:00

This blog has been hacked by Kelly!!!!! Welcome to your new blog Claire!

OK Here's the real thang

2008-01-12T22:00:00.000-05:00

OK, so here it is, One More Saturday Night (The Dead)and what am I doing? Hmm, hanging out with my bestest friend. Yup, that's right, Kelly. The girl at McDonald's thinks we are a couple. We left as the police were pulling up. We didn't do it. Not even sure what it was.

Today was again, Kelly comes to Claire's and cleans the pigsty. Jessie's room. She also did the bathroom without a Hazmat suit. I am very impressed. She is now under observation. No lie. She also brought cake. She has lost all vestiges of sanity. Big word just for Nate.

See that black cat, she is terrified of mylar balloons. She is also afraid of air and everything else, but she is not afraid of Noah. If you have ever heard Trent's story about mylar balloons and burning cars, you will understand why it is so funny. The cat was trying to hide in the microwave but Kelly wouldn't open the door. I say cook the kitty. Not sure how that all ties in together but it works in my head.

By the way, Kelly is a-ok. She wanted me to let everyone know that she is doing great just doesn't have time to blog, Betty.

Does everyone know, Trent got a Facebook. LOL

I know that I started this with some kind of point but it has become pointless. I am not sure what the point was. Pig is throwing stuff at me and Kelly is encouraging her. We were trying to understand why Noah calls me Mommy and my son Daddy and Kelly Grandma. It is a Kentucky thing I guess. No offense meant. Right.

If anyone is interested, I have decided to take time off from school. It's all Kelly's fault. Not really, she just helped me set my priorities. I realized that working full-time and going to school full-time is like working two jobs with not a lot of time for my children. I think that my priority right now needs to be them. There will be plenty of time later to do school, besides I like my job and make decent money and have lots of flexibility in my schedule. My daughter was quite excited to find out that I would be more available to spend time with her without trying to do tons of homework. Besides I am tired, really tired.

If anyone is interested in teaching my son how to parallel park please contact me. He tells me that I stress him out so I try not to talk when he is driving, but that has problems too. Like me squealing when we get too close to the curb, stuff like that. Jessie yelling "are we gonna die?" doesn't help either. We have issues. Same difference. I hate those two words.

Someone, not naming names, is working on a Sunday School lesson, and in the words of Noah, "That's inappropriate." Not sure what they teach in that class, but I don't think that my class could handle it. I am pretty sure that Trent couldn't handle it in SALT. It might be funny to see him try.

Peace out man!

Just for Queenie

2008-01-12T21:54:00.001-05:00

Water Buffalo

2007-12-28T16:26:00.000-05:00

So I really don't have anything to Blog about, but this morning while getting ready for work I heard them talking about the most watched YouTube video and I remembered seeing this one once before on the news a couple of months ago. So I thought I would share it with you cuz it is pretty amazing. It was caught on tape by a tourist on safari and just got lucky. The odds of this happening and being caught on tape are astronomical. It is about 8 minutes long but don't blink you might miss something.

Speed Dial

2007-12-14T17:46:00.000-05:00

OK, so I am sitting here deleting spam when I remember that I forgot (same difference) to take my English test and must go do that now. When the phrase speed dial pops in my head and makes me laugh. I know you are thinking what is she on now? I don't know but it occurred to me that the speed dial feature on my phone requires me to enter a three digit number to call someone and heck if I can remember that then I can remember their number. Just wanted to share the idiotic stuff that fills my head when trying to avoid doing something productive.

It's Quiet Here

2007-12-09T15:35:00.000-05:00

Well, the kids just left for the afternoon visit at their Dads' house and it is really quiet. I started the washing machine so I could have some quiet noise.
Christmas Tree is up Jessie decorated it and her cat is determined to eat it. The other two cats just sleep under it. Feels a little like Christmas now. Meds seem to be working better and I don't feel quite so jumbled in my brain anymore. Two more finals to go and then no school for a couple of weeks. (Yes Rodney, I know, you have no classes.) As of now I am enrolled in 5 classes but I don't think that I can handle that with the kids. If I get rid of them I will keep the classes else I will have to drop one --of the classes. LOL
Here is something exciting -- I am actually going to try and make Green bean something or other for our class X-mas get together. Scary I know but how hard can it be to follow a recipe?
Kelly you are my date for that this coming Saturday night at 6:30 Fellowship Hall be there or be super square. Think we are doing an 80's theme. Big hair and roller skates.
I am off to tidy up the living room, try to study and take a nap, but as usual nap will probably win out over the other two.
Almost forgot, for those interested I am starting the Official Bridger DeName Fan Club. I might even make "special badges" that we can wear.

You are safe from my cooking I am now bringing corn. I don't think that I can do much damage to that.

Pork Chops and Applesauce

2007-11-06T17:46:00.000-05:00

I don't remember where I have heard that before, but it keeps running through my head. It sounded so good that, here we go, I came home from work and made pork chops, mashed potatoes and creamed corn, and of course, applesauce. I have always wondered why one dips pork chops in applesauce but I can remember doing so my whole life, and I am old. Almost as old as Moses. All I know is that they taste good together.
Here is something funny, at least it is to me. Monday nights almost feels like a flashback to a "psychedelic" time in my life. Letter writing for Faith, when a couple of the ladies get going my brain starts to spin. They just talk even when no one is listening, and if you do try to answer them they just talk right over you. It is quite hysterical. Judging by C's laughter I think she finds it pretty funny too.

I Have No Bananas

2007-11-04T14:18:00.000-05:00

That just popped into my head, so it works. Not much to write. OK that is a lie, but not anything that I want to share with the world. New meds and I feel as though I have my own form of ADD or ADHD or Just Can't Focus And Don't Really Want To So Just Stop Talking or something like that. I really am making an effort and am probably listening even if it appears that I am not. Can a person develop a form of autism as they get older or is it something else? Eye contact seems incredibly difficult lately. Maybe I am just wacko and am slowly slipping away but can't tell if that is it or not. Creepy crawlie is a good expression. OK I have shared enough now I must do homework or sleep they seem equally inviting.

Cracking up

2007-10-02T20:27:00.001-04:00

I wrote an awesome post, telling exactly how I feel right now, regarding my life, motherhood and the whole thing. Guess what? I accidentally posted it on our Bible study class blog, so I had to delete it quickly. Didn't want anyone calling Pastor or Trent and crying that I scared them. Wimps. Yes, that is my mood. I am so outta here it isn't funny. If I don't say good-bye, then I am not sorry. There are people in my life that I care deeply for, but I am tired of everything. My kids being the brats that they can be, the animals they insist on having that no one wants to care for, the surprises said animals are now leaving, the working my butt off and never getting anywhere. This isn't life this sucks. I have been given more than I can handle and I can't deal with it. Love ya.

Judgement House

2007-09-30T15:15:00.000-04:00

Just a shout out to my "Sistah" Stephanie who has joined the blogging world. She is doing a lot of work promoting and memorizing lines for our Church's upcoming Judgement House production. Check out her blog at http://www.blessedkendence.blogspot.com/.

I tease Stephanie ALOT, probably more than I should, but I love her to death.

Living a Christian Life

2007-09-15T21:52:00.000-04:00

What the heck does that mean? I hear things like "that's not very Christian" or "I am trying to be a good Christian" or "I don't do that because I am Christian." I am pretty sure that I have said at least one of those things before but what does that mean. I want to be free of the label of "good Christian." I want to be a "bad" Christian. Whatever that means. I guess that I just want to enjoy life and do the things that I like to do and hang out with the people that I like to hang out with and talk about the stuff that we like to talk about. Doesn't make us good or bad. I don't feel like I have fun any more. I am so busy trying to be a good example and I am forgetting who I am. I wasn't a bad person before I got saved, I just didn't know Jesus and who He is.

I miss myself.

I saw part of that person today at the children's museum. No Kelly, not the me that wanted to scream at the kid who was screaming at the top of his lungs in that very high ear-drum piercing way, actually I wanted to say something to his parents, along the lines of stop spoiling him rotten and he won't do that in public, but the me that sat down at the table with the glue, paper, feathers, and yes just a touch of glitter for you. I miss that person. Jessie told me that she could not remember me ever painting a picture with her. I love doing stuff like that. I just don't show anybody the finished work and Kelly saw why. My favorite artist is Picasso. Anyone can paint like him.

That phrase "what would Jesus do" just popped into my head and I think He would tell us all to just shut-up and listen and get down to the business of living. Sharing with our friends, having good times, teaching our children the right way to live and how to treat others seems more important to me than being a "good" Christian.

What is a good Christian?

If I do these things right then I am a good Christian and Heaven forbid if I slip and stay what I am really thinking once in a while sorry if I offend you but I am not perfect just forgiven.

The expressed views are mine and mine alone and are in no way shared with the advertisers. LOL

A must read

2007-09-08T12:29:00.000-04:00

Please check this out. This is written by a friend at church.

Sick again

2007-08-28T12:51:00.001-04:00

That's right. I am sick again. I just got over this crud in June and now it is back again. I am on medication that tends to cause some dizziness. No comments from the peanut gallery. People tell me how Kentucky is one of the leading states for allergies and other upper respiratory problems. There should be signs at the border: Do Not Enter Unless You Like Being Sick. I have threatened to move many times, that won't happen. I will probably die here in Kentucky. Of allergy related complications.

I look forward to the day my son starts college, cuz I have said that is the day I move outta here. Hasta la vista, baby. No more Kentucky, no more snot filled head. Nice image, eh? I say that now, but when the time comes it won't happen. My daughter will beg to stay and I will be too lazy to pack. LOL

I can dream.

I am insane

2007-08-18T20:25:00.000-04:00

So, not only do I have three cats, all with varying quirks, I am now the owner of a Guinea Pig. Thanks Kelly for the link to the cheapcycle, it has cool stuff, including a $10 pig with cage and food. Or Spider Pig, as I keep calling it. Ever since Glenn told me to sing the stupid Spider Pig song from the Simpsons when I was upset, it has stuck. Technically, my daughter, Jessie, is the owner, but we all know how that goes.

I also have officially enrolled in College Algebra, French 1, and Eng Lit War Genre. I am truly wacked. Went to get books today. Wow! French book was $198. I was hoping to find my Algebra book from before, but it is buried so I must spend the $87 for a used book that is ugly. Lit class has 4 books, including A Farewell to Arms, by Hemingway, and Red Badge of Courage, the other 2 I haven't really looked at. One of them is by a soldier in the Iraq war. Should be interesting reading.

There was something else.......thinking....oh yeah my other computer, the fancy one that I bought for Glenn to use for gaming and stuff, is broken again hmmmmm this cheap one I got at wal-mart seems to do just fine. I am glad that I spent the extra $120 for 3 year service. They have replaced the mother board and now they think it could be mother board related but can probably fix it by adding ethernet card in expansion slot. Son is lost without Guild Wars.

Wonder who will win...guinea pig or cat??

Heavy Stuff

2007-08-13T21:45:00.001-04:00

K on Monday nights we are involved in a ministry at church called F.A.I.T.H. We eat dinner together then some go to the sanctuary and pray while others go to classes. They are split into beginners and continuers (my word). Beginners are taught by our Pastor following an outline that we use when making visits explaining salvation. The rest of us are learning about different Faiths and this 8 weeks is Islam. We had our second class tonight and it is hard to describe some of what we are learning. The Pastor teaching the class includes current events and tonight we saw an American soldier getting shot (he lived) while listening to the Islamic extremist chanting Allah Akbar as he shoots him. It is hard to reconcile using God's name while trying to kill another human being. Granted our God and their Allah are not the same. I don't believe that our God would condone that type of killing, or maybe we need to become more like them. Willing to kill or be killed for our Faith. Would I do that? Do I believe that He would call me to that type of battle? I personally don't think so. Would I die for my Faith? I don't really want to be tested, but I hope that if that time ever comes, that I have the strength to proclaim Jesus Christ, My Lord and Saviour.

Not sure why I wrote about that but needed to spit it out.

Blogging

2007-08-12T14:19:00.000-04:00

Have you ever read a blog and wondered what they were thinking. I read back over mine, and the stream of consciousness stuff is wild. How do I get from one thought to another and the fact is that I actually type this stuff the same way that I am thinking about it.

I noticed in last blog that I was writing about Laurie and then suddenly I am writing about cats. I know why but it looks funny. I had a conversation about my cats with her and it reminded me that I wanted to put pictures up of my daughter's ugly Betty cat. You can't help but love it cuz it is that bizarre. I have been trying to take pictures but she won't hold still.

Carwash at church was great! Got a little sun washed alot of cars and had a huge water fight with my daughter. It helped work out some of those tweenie issues. Time to shop.

Quick tease

2007-08-10T21:42:00.000-04:00

Really, I wan to blog and have lots to say but I am tired and have to be up early so that I can go to church and wash other peoples cars. Not sure how that works but at least I get to get wet. Hmmmmmm get to get not sure of that grammar. I am going back to school this semester. I am very excited and am counting down the days. I am into that kinda torture. I plan on getting a degree in about 2 years, then another one and then another one. Anything to put off paying student loans. I had qualms or doubts about my chosen degree after I became saved, but I think that I can handle the science versus creation aspect just fine. I will ignore it when need be. LOL Oh, my chosen field is Anthropology. It has always been, ever since I was a young girl and read a book about Jane Goodall. I wanted to move to Africa and live with the chimps and Jane. My mom said no, something about malaria, so this will have to do. Some dreams just take longer to reach.

Pampered Chef......Designing Women episode "Lady June Bugs" or something like that. It's funny to me. Went to Kelly's good company, good food, and even got some neat kitchen gadgets that I will never use but my 12 year old will love. Have I ever told y'all how much I detest cooking. I am really a feminist at heart and think it should be a man's job, but since I have no man I resort to the microwave.

I made a new friend tonight. Laurie, you are awesome. I loved meeting you, you are even better in person than on your blog. I look forward to us getting to know each other better. I must get some pictures of my odd cats on here. I can write a good blog just on them. They each have their own issues. Quite hysterical.

Well, laundry then bed, dreams of carwashes in my head.

Just playing

2007-07-28T16:13:00.001-04:00

Does it count that I signed in and changed my blogs colors?

Stuff

2007-07-20T17:56:00.000-04:00

Again, I have no clue where I wrote down password. This is why I don't sign on here, cuz by the time I figure it out I don't want to write. I need to be cleaning the daughter's room. (Trashing everything) Son is frantically texting me to be at WM at midnight for book. NOT gonna do it. I would make him, but he is in St. Louis with his summer program. I am really sleepy hence very grouchy. I wanted to write about Creation Museum, but think a nap would be better.

One of my favorites. Something reassuring about a beast that likes to eat anything that moves.

Martin Luther, I saw an awesome movie about him.

Garden of Eden. Wish I was there right now.

Picture says it all.

Violent Ejection or Best Friends??

2007-05-28T13:29:00.001-04:00

It's rafting season again. We went, we paddled, we fell out. Our guide mentioned something about being violently ejected from the raft, wasn't sure what she meant until surfing at Greyhound and Kelly rammed her head into my stomach, violently ejecting me from the raft. That's what friends are for. It was fun, but I found a rock with my arm and it is sore. Other than that I stayed in the boat. It hurts to type even. Check out the picture at the bottom.

2007-05-23T06:26:00.000-04:00

Help me Obi-Wan, the Dark Side is taking over. I can't fight it much longer.

Passwords and stuff

2007-05-15T17:21:00.000-04:00

Well, it has been so long that I had to do the try every combination of name and password thing just to sign in again. I really only use maybe 3 different passwords and 2 different screen names so I didn't think it would be so difficult. But this is one of those e-mail kinda things so it took me awhile. Writing down password now.

So, I am thinking of all the stuff that I can blog about and I can hear Trent's voice in my head "you can't say that." So, I am back again to an earlier question: if you think it is that just as bad as voicing it? Probably, but I, as in the title of a forgotten movie of a not so great actress, have had "ENOUGH!" LOL The voice is back reminding me that I am better off by not airing all of my dirty laundry in public because we never know who might be reading or listening. I will take that advice and pray on it and know that God will direct me.

On a much happier note, I am once again taking the plunge! No I am not getting married, silly people. Even better, I am going rafting again with Kelly. Through the awesome friendships that I have been opened up to, I have been encouraged to make the trip. Not to mention that a certain rafter made the statement "if you are in my raft I won't let you fall out." Hmmm we shall see. Not that I really want to fall in the river, people pee in there (heck, I peed in there), but I did get a great photo of the New River under water last year.

That was taken under the raft as I was trying to find the right light to swim to. Hmm I hope there is only one right light I would hate to make a wrong turn. I do have a little anxiety about falling in, those guides just love to say, if you fall in here swim like crazy, or if you fall in here you might die. No relaxing cruise down the river with them around.

I am actually looking forward to the drive and maybe we can make a wrong turn and stop at the Price is Right or take pictures at the cemetery with the big happy face satellite dish. Who knows, but now that I know what the Pink Pony is, I am sure that I don't want to get a burger there. LOL I just know that it is great fun to be racing down those little not quite 2 lane roads in a church van not knowing where you are going in the middle of the night. At least it will be daylight this time. Wonder who is driving?

Seeing as the subject of road trips is on my mind, Kelly has suggested a trip to Florida. The destination is unknown to me, several cities have been mentioned, but I would follow her to Africa so why worry. I am working on the birth certificate thing. I am thinking the the 23 people who live in the 3 bedroom duplex down the street might be able to help me out there. Hope they spell my name right. OK OK, I shouldn't have said that.

My other space

2007-03-16T20:06:00.000-04:00

I have been trying out that other web site. The one where my kids hang out. I have a headache. Not sure where I will be blogging next.

Where to start

2007-02-27T18:51:00.000-05:00

I have been told, several times, that I really need to get back to blogging. I just don't seem to find the time. I have plenty of stories but can't squeeze in the energy to write them. I am trying.

Singles Ski Trip: I had the best roomies in the world. Very entertaining.

Fuddruckers Hamburger Joint: Strange women will approach you and proceed to hug, cuddle, and kiss you while waiting in line and discussing men and women with their boyfriend. It was one of those bizarre moments in my life that was witnessed by Stephanie. Usually I am alone with no witnesses to the oddities in my life. After my new best friend gave me a wet kiss and wandered off, Steph looked at me and said who was that, to which I replied I have no idea. Turns out that Stephanie thought that I knew the young lady and was really starting to wonder about me.

This is why I truly believe that I am a freak magnet. Things like this happen all the time, but at least I had a witness this time.

Wal-Mart---Safe Haven, NOT! : My best friend says seeing as I am at work, she has something to tell me. I get that stomach feeling, she says I am dating someone now. I say that is awesome (just a small feeling of oh no, I am going to lose her) then I ask who,(like an owl) she tells me Derrick. I pick up pretend sword and begin to beat her with it. She had to tell me cuz it was day before singles trip and I would have figured it out pretty quick. Still digesting it.

So now my other best friend appears to be pairing off with and I am happy for her, actually for both of them, but I am also selfish, and don't want to share them. I wish them both more happiness than the world contains. I know that God will guide them and that what will be will be, but woe to the man that hurts my friends. LOL just kidding. NOT!!

FAITH: I was all set on having perfect attendance this semester, but God had other plans. My son had a sore throat Sunday morning so on Monday I call the doctor and make an appointment. Then Jessie calls me from school cuz she doesn't feel well. Add her to the doctor appointment. After waiting an eternity the kids get the ol' swab down the throat gag me yuck thing done. After a bit, doctor comes in (Dr. Linda Lear we love dearly) 2 for 2. Both positive for strep. Woohooo party time. Since Glenn is clearly the sicker one she decides to run a flu test on him. This is so gross that I gagged. I will spare you the details. That test came back positive. The assumption is then made that Jessie will most likely catch it also. I, being a diabetic, got a flu shot in December. I am hoping I am protected. After some discussion with sis Kelly we decide that just to be safe that I should stay home that night. I would really have been upset if I too were sick and spread it around. It is now Tuesday night and I am still symptom free. I am hopeful that I can attend wednesday night.

I may be back soon. I may swith to my space have not decided.

I Believe

2006-11-18T12:45:00.000-05:00

Dear readers,
Thank you for staying faithful. Hahaha Ok, so it's been a while since I posted. Those that know me might even understand why, those that don't, well....you might want to stay out of the way.

I have decided that I really do have some sort of pheronome that exudes a freak scent. Translation: if you are the least bit freaky you will find me and some how glom onto me. Now this isn't always a bad thing. Certain people at church have informed me that they are freaks, and I really love them(especially one certain one with their really cute smile) and I appreciate that not all freaks are bad.

It is funny though, that the stranger the people around me become the more I feel like I might shatter into a million pieces. OK OK, don't worry I don't need psychiatric help, well maybe I do, I just need to learn how to stay away from people. Not all people just the ones that I think are unusual cuz they tend to become the freakiest. and call you at noon, drunk, and emotional and I still try to understand them.

And what about ex-boyfriends that eat lunch with you every day and start to remind you of how much fun you used to have and wouldn't it be fun to do this or that again????? Yes it would, but I am not gonna do it and he can't make me.

A certain other situation has me kinda wierded out too. I thought I was ok but then someone made a suggestion and I lost it while talking to Kelly on the phone and have tried to avoid the person who tried to suggest it. I know that doesn't make any sense but it does to me and it will to Kelly (since we share a brain, sometimes).

I start my new position at Wal-Mart on monday and am really looking forward to it. I will be working in the office and not out on the sales floor, looking for accounting errors and shrink. I am excited about it. Lots of changes have happened at work this last week, some peeps have been fired, some have been locked up in the office in meetings, and Larry the HR District Manager has been around lately. And all this the week before Blitz day. By the way, nothing real exciting on Blitz this year but it starts at 5 am, and I won't be there. For the first time in almost 9 years.

Well, that is enough for now. I am off to try to find my happy bunny.

what do your pets do while you're at work? funny pet stuff, pet humor

2006-09-30T21:58:00.000-04:00

what do your pets do while you're at work? funny pet stuff, pet humor

2006-09-30T21:56:00.000-04:00

Bunny

2006-09-30T21:45:00.000-04:00

I just noticed that my Bunny picture is now censored. Apparently someone was not being nice to the Happy Bunny and they are no longer available. I am so sad.

Ages and Ages

2006-09-17T14:05:00.000-04:00

So, it has been forever since I last posted but no one seems to be reading it so I guess it doesn't matter.

Went white water rafting again on Sept. 11, and had the greatest time in the world. Songer Rafting in West Virginia does an awesome job. It was a great way to sit back and reflect on the anniversary of 9/11. To look around and see that the beauty of God's creation is still alive and well and that we, as a nation, are survivors.
The drive to and from WV was great, almost better than the actual rafting. If you ever go and want a really laid back, mellow, relaxing, adrenaline rush, ask for Matt Stam(?) to be your guide, if you want total insanity, yelling and wiping out alot ask for Joey.

Bunny Droppings

2006-08-17T15:55:00.000-04:00

Ok, so maybe the bunny is a little over the top, but I love the happy bunny. I am quite amused by it.

Eleven year-olds

2006-08-07T16:52:00.000-04:00

I have been trying to think of my next blog, and have been completely blank. Things have been happening that are completely horrible, but I can't share them. Some things have been happening that are pretty cool, but I don't want to share them. :)

Then there is my daughter, Jessie. I love my daughter more than I can ever express. Those of you with children know what that feeling is. You would do anything in your power for your child. Jessie is 11, she is starting 6th grade next week, and she will not clean her room. What more can I say. For four weeks now I have been asking, begging, pleading, threatening, and even resorted to bribery. Not happening, mom. When the room subject comes up, her eyes glaze over, her mouth drops open and all that is missing is the drool. It is as though she just can't hear me.

She has the ability to reduce me to a primal scream, can't think straight, pulling my hair out, all I want to do is shake her, kind of emotion. It really freaks me out. My son doesn't do that to me, he sometimes annoys me, but Jessie is able to totally freak me out. Movie of the week, bad mom, kind of thing. No, I don't beat her or, shake her, or even touch her in anger, and I try really hard not to lose my temper with her. I don't always succeed, and when I do yell I feel like the worst parent in the world, and apologize like crazy. I just wonder why she can do that to me, and I wonder if she takes pleasure in doing it.

Threats don't work, she doesn't care. Grounding her doesn't work, she will just sit in her room and read. I have begged her with tears in my eyes and she just gives me that funny look, as though she thinks I am crazy. I finally paid her $2 for a bag of trash. I have finally given her the ultimatum that whatever is on the floor is going in the trash. I believe that this was her plan all along. If she makes me crazy enough she figures that I will just do it for her. She is partly right, but this time will be different, and I have made it very clear. Tomorrow when I drop her off at the school for orientation, I am coming home and throwing it all away. Whether it be brand new school clothes, or her favorite book, if it is not put away it is gone.

I don't think that she believes me, yet. She will.

New weapon, slumber party on Friday night at the church, hmmmmm maybe that might work.

AmuSinG

2006-07-28T22:30:00.000-04:00

I can't believe it, but I seem to be all talked out. I know, I know, you (all 3 of you) can't believe it, but sadly, it is true. God has made me extremely happy today.

I can't write when I am happy.

Well, maybe that is too extreme because I believe that I could write volumes about the things that make me happy, but as we studied tonight, it isn't all about stuff but living apart from the world and worldy "things."
Living in the words of Christ.

So that CD player that I really want isn't really the right choice.

How to leave all that behind and die for Christ is a tough decision. It is not about happiness. Christ did not die so that I can be happy, He died so that I could have forgiveness.

And I am grumbling about a CD player.

Soldiers

2006-07-23T15:11:00.000-04:00

If we gain an insight from God, is it diminished by sharing it with others? If we are overly enthusiastic in speaking of said insight is this not almost bragging? Does that then not make it something less than it is?

Would it not be better to quietly savor those moments of truth with God almost meditatively rather than shouting them from the roof tops? Some good things do not need to be spoken of. Some things can be seen in the demeanor and actions of a person. Living an abundant life with joy and most especially humor. I have experienced some pretty amazing things these last couple of weeks, but I am a selfish person and want to keep them close to me. I don't want them tarnished by those who doubt. I am the first to loudly proclaim the good that has come to my life because of my relationship with Jesus Christ. I would never deny the awesome acts that have changed my love of life and faith.

Nor would I ever deny my faith. I relish those moments when I proclaim that I am a born again Christian who believes that Jesus Christ is my Lord and Savior. I want to fight those battles with non-believers, I feel honored that I am a soldier defending my God. I would do anything that He asks of me, some may doubt that statement, I dare you to test me.

I only have to answer to One, and He knows what is in my heart.

P.S. to No Deep Thoughts

2006-07-14T10:50:00.000-04:00

Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead. I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.

Philippians 3:13,14

No Deep Thoughts Here....

2006-07-14T09:10:00.000-04:00

I woke up this morning feeling pretty good. I had some cool e-mail. Made me laugh, said a prayer and realized that the song "I feel good" was playing in my head. You know the one I mean. Everyone has heard it before. Just maybe not in their head. I have come to realize that not everyone will acknowledge out-loud that they have a voice in their head. Your inner commentary on life. Stop and listen real close to it, cuz it will never steer you wrong. Mine sings to me, cries with me, sometimes yells loudly at me (gives me a headache), but for the most part it communicates with me. I know I know, you are thinking "she's nuts." Maybe I am, but if so, crazy ain't so bad.

I have been learning a lot about myself and the people around me. I spend more time now listening to people and really trying to get to know them, not just skimming the surface so to speak. I am not always happy with some of the insights that I gain, but realize that it is just one way of God letting me know what I need to work on. I believe that He has great plans for me but that I am just not ready yet.

I still need to learn to trust in Him 100%. I need to give it all to Him. That is tough. I am a tough cookie. I can do it by myself, I don't need any help. Sure I don't. My voice has been telling me to get real, life is a lot easier now that I am building a relationship with Jesus. I don't have to do everything by myself, He is in me to help me, not to tell me what I can and can't do.

The other night a wise friend said some things that made me go hmmmm, he said among other things (can't remember exact words) no matter who tells you what you can and can't do, you can do anything you want to, it is up to you to decide if it is right for you or whether by doing it, it would bring someone else down in the process.

I had never thought about it like that before. In that, someone else could be looking at me to see how I live my Christian life as an example for them. Me. Why would someone look to me, but I realized that it is like that everyday, people I work with see the changes in me and they watch. Granted they are probably watching to see if I fall, but never-the-less they are watching and that is probably my most powerful ally in witnessing to them. If I, Claire L. Chevrefils, can come to know and love Jesus with all my heart, then there is hope for the rest of the world, one person at a time, maybe that is my mission. Have to start somewhere.

On Vacation and too much time on my hands

2006-07-13T16:48:00.000-04:00

It is always nice to see that my kids can on occasion act like they love each other. This is one of those moments. I think. Or it could just be that brother is getting ready to tip sister and sister is yelling at brother to get away. I think that I will stick to my first assumption. It makes me feel good.

slam Slam SLAM!!!

2006-07-10T14:35:00.000-04:00

Camping was great. We packed everything and everyone into Kelly's car, just a wee bit cramped, and made the 2 plus hour drive to the town of Falls of Rough and the Rough River/Lake. We got there Thursday evening set up tents and got some sleep. Sort of. Our tent site was nice enough close to the playground and to the restrooms. Hence, the title, the bathroom doors were on springs and some people seemed to take great delight in how loud they could get the door to slam, especially at 5 am. No sooner than you doze back off then, SLAM! It was almost funny at times. Almost as funny as the invasion of kids to the playground, with the oldest loudly threatening to kick some child's butt every 2 minutes.

Enough about that.

The beach was sandy, sun was hot, water was cool. Kids had a great time swimming and so did we. Found out that fish like to bite people and cigarette butts but not bait. I went into the lake and was standing talking to Kelly and almost immediately something was tugging on the string anklet my daughter made for me. I made a bee line to shallow water to see if I had caught anything. No such luck. Kids kept popping up yelling for the fish to leave them alone. It was pretty funny.

Did a little bit of fishing, but it was just too hot for me sitting in the sun. Didn't catch anything, but saw the fish looking at us like "you really think I will bite that". Lost a few hooks and bobbers, and finally decided that swimming was better. The lake water has permanently stained white t-shirts a nasty yellow that bleaching doesn't even help.

Really had a great time, no really strange things happened to us, well, maybe the invasion of the ants on Kelly's windshield. It was pretty disgusting. But other than that, oh we did find the local Wal-Mart, and we did make it through the roundabout a couple of times without incident, so all in all a very good trip.

We are already planning another trip and hope to get some of our classmates to join us. Just say the word and we are gone.

2006-07-04T07:20:00.000-04:00

Kaboom!

Where to Start?

2006-07-02T22:55:00.000-04:00

I don't know what to write. There is so much to talk about. First things first, God is Good and He does some pretty cool things. I never realized that by joining a church that I would gain a family. Today while singing at church I started reflecting on all of the new people in my life and how much I would miss them if they went away.

Of course, there are the immediate people, those in my Bible Study Class--our teachers, Patrick and Sabrina, Lynn, the Davids (all 3) Shawna, Paul, Amanda, Greg, Rodney, Carol, Derrick, Joe, Charles, Wally, the list goes on and on, Sorry if I forgot to mention you by name.

There are also the leaders in the church, at least those that I come into contact with, Trent, is patience is amazing, even when we act like 3 year olds, Donna, who keeps us all in line :) Pastor Henard who has probably had one of the biggest influences in mine and my sons lives. He is an awesome teacher. Even if I do make camping lists while he is talking, I still hear him.

There are the 20Somethingers, some that I have come to know better than others, I am always very struck, when I talk with young women like Dr. Dename. So young but knowing what she wants and getting it. I hope those like her will be there to help guide my daughter as she grows up.

And then there is Kelly, thought I forgot ya, huh. Day by day our friendship grows stronger. It is an amazing thing to be to have someone in my life that I trust wholeheartedly(besides God). It is so wonderful to just know that 9 times out of 10 when are thinking the same exact thought. It's kinda fun. Thank you more than I can express.

The greatest thing that I have found is God. He has opened my eyes to see what I could not see before. I have no way of really expressing it in words, it is such a strong emotion in my heart. I thank Him often for waiting for me and showing me the way. Everyday I come a little bit closer to living my abundant life. There are those people closest to me, I think they know who they are, that make my heart sing just to be around them. Thank you.

I didn't start out to write this. I was going to write about dirt track racing, old drunk men with no teeth, getting hit in the head with dirt clods, and very loud cars. It was great and I paid money to experience all these things. I can't wait to go back again.

I also was going to write about the picnic and fireworks. Not much to say, lots of food, great company, and amazing fireworks. Too bad it had to end. Maybe I will revisit these topics, but now I must work on my camping list. Oh yeah, we are going camping this week, encouraged by some and given puzzled looks by others. Two women with kids, are y'all crazy. That may be so but crazy seems ok to me. Besides, Paul can scare away the wild animals while us women set up the tent. Can't wait.

The Last of the Canoe Trip

2006-06-29T20:09:00.000-04:00

This is me having a great time.
I really love the life jacket as an accessory.
It goes with everything.

My wonderful children having a good time. This seems to be rare these days, as they get older they seem to bicker all the time. Constantly picking at each other and it makes me crazy.

Glenn and Jessie inspecting Noah's crawdad. Jessie eventually picked it up, getting pinched in the process, so that Noah couls once again sit in the canoe without being concerned about it.

And then, the end of the day, paddling away, to the long staircase at the end. I think carrying the canoe up the stairs wore me out more than anything. They are very heavy.

Part 2 of many. See previous post.

2006-06-26T18:36:00.000-04:00

Just a pic of the beautiful scenery that we got to see. There is a deer by the fallen tree, it crossed the river in front of us. It was one of those moments that make you go hmmm.
Not sure if Jess saw it, she says she did but she was looking the wrong way.

Sleepydo doing her best "leave me alone" impression. It got better. She actually smiled and had fun the rest of the day.

Glenn also known as the Green Giant, happy as can be in the kayak. Made better by the fact that he rode alone and did not have to be in close proximity to Sleepydo.

More to follow.

Oh no we are stuck again

2006-06-26T15:21:00.000-04:00

Why is that pronounced kahnew? Why did they bother to teach us phonetics when it doesn't always work? I digress. We, meaning me, my children and best friend Kelly and her children, took a little canoe trip on Saturday.

It was slammin' and I have the bruise to prove it.

Started off a little rushed, giant of a son, Glenn, needed swim shoes to wear in the river so of course, daughter, Jessie, had to have some. Get to Kelly's and I sign our lives away on the standard release of liability forms, and we are off.

Not sure how many different roads we took, but all of them had different numbers and we were thinking that we should be marking the trail to find our way back home. My kids and I were coming up with code names for e-one, my son being green giant-6'2" and fav color green, daughter is sleepy-do,cuz she is interesting when asleep, my name is still pending. We were trying out names for Kelly's kids when Kelly named herself--Roadkill (in her defense, it was already dead). We then passed on to other topics forgetting names until later in the day. I will come back to that.

One sharp right turn, near miss, and then a quick left, screeching to a stop we were there. You park down the street at someone's house. I love Kentucky. We rode the really short bus up the road to drop-off point, nice people carried our canoes down the bank to the river, and off we went. My son doing some interesting wiggling as he figured out how to balance in a kayak. That is another one of those phonetic nightmares.

I came to the quick conclusion that no matter how much my daughter and I love each other, we make each other crazy. I had a couple of moments of wanting to just knock her out of the canoe but figured that it would end up tipping over. She paddles when and how she wants to, regardless of what I say. Just like our relationship at home. I am learning how to use that to my advantage. It is a tough lesson to learn.

It was great. I thought I lost Kelly at the beginning cuz when I turned around her canoe was gone. She was off on the other side of the grass. The thought crossed my mind that if we put my daughter and her older son in a canoe together, they would probably go in circles a lot. We may have to test that theory.

Even with sleepydo having her moments of attitude and me thinking of dumping her we had sooooo much fun and can't wait to do it again. I was so incredibly proud of my son, first time kayaking and he only tipped over once. Even after his paddle broke in half. He made the best of it and used one piece and had a very small kayak/canoe.

When we stopped for lunch, Kelly and I really learned what the term "snot covered bowling balls" meant. Every time we took a step on the wet rocks, one of us would fall or slip or slide. It was pretty funny.

I could write for hours about that trip but this is getting long, I will have to add a second part with pics. Saw some great wildlife.

Back to code names: John is now Leech Boy, and Noah is Crawdad Boy. I am not sure how they did it but they managed to catch some of said wildlife. Hahaha Thought I was going to have to use my CPR training on Kelly at that point.

The drive home was almost as much fun as the river. My son was navigating and decided to go a different way. When I saw the rough crossing sign, I was a little puzzled, what are we crossing? Then the faded paint on the road RR, what? no rr tracks around here, at that moment I went oh no!!! as we went airborne. When we landed, Sleepydo sat up and asked where we were then promptly went back to sleep. I was laughing so hard and the look on Kelly's face in the mirror was priceless, she did manage to slow down some but her car was bouncing something good.............

Being Bad

2006-06-23T16:32:00.000-04:00

Can one be bad and still be good?

Who decides what is bad? Are there degrees of badness? Does having bad thoughts make you bad, or is it just bad if you speak them out loud?

If everyone is thinking the same thing and one person says it out loud are they all bad or just the one person?

Who decides this? Cuz I need some answers, is talking/teasing/flirting bad? If so, how do figure out if the other person likes you?

What if you badly want something? Is that ok as long as it isn't something that you want from someone else?

I wish God had an e-mail address. I know, I know, He has a kneel-mail address, but sometimes you just want to know.

Right now.

p.s. I will not be going outside when there is a possibility of lightning striking me.

p.s.s. Does that fall in the category of bad?

Don't Know

2006-06-20T06:23:00.000-04:00

I intended to write a nice long post last night, about something, I don't know what, but when it came right down to it, I went to bed. Sleep seems to be a priority lately. I was so exhausted yesterday it was ridiculous. At work I could barely drag myself around, I don't think that I accomplished a whole lot. It was like being in a fog and never really shaking it off. I hate feeling that way.

Today is a little bit better. I am somewhat awake, and actually typing so that is good. I look forward to going to work, I know, I am sick. The only thing that would be better, would be if this was a payday week. I am always broke. Even when I have money I am broke. I don't know how that happens. I make a reasonable amount of money, but when I look at where and how I spend it, again, ridiculous.

Spending money I am good at, saving money I am horrible at. Why do we even need money. Let's just get rid of it. I am going to live in a tent somewhere, where it doesn't snow and live like a gypsy. I don't want to have so many bills anymore.

I must go to work now, so that I can buy the super deluxe 10 room cabin tent, with fridge and air conditioning.

Bone Crusher, Flesh Eater, Whatever It Is......

2006-06-15T16:55:00.000-04:00

We are going rafting again or farting for those who are keyboard challenged.

Actually, first we are going paddling. A calm, relaxing, renewing, lazy day on the Elkhorn. Yeah right, my daughter and I in a canoe together, fighting over who is in charge. My son in a kayak yelling, look Mom, watch this, and Kelly, in the other canoe trying to keep her youngest son in the canoe. I am laughing as I sit here typing this.

It will be an awesome day, and we will remember it for years to come.

Now, on to rafting. Yes, Songer "computer geek" we are coming back again. Not as many of us this time but we are planning a lazy day on the New River. Again I laugh, as I recall our last trip, the first day was incredible, perfect weather, nice water, some intense adrenaline moments and some great surfing. Thanks Matt, you got us in the big hole on the first try, and then returned there 2 more times. Yes I fell in, so did Kelly. It was intense and the water didn't taste that good.

Second day of rafting was not as enjoyable, don't get me wrong it was great. Sun shining, more water, the river was up higher, even more intense moments, couldn't make the surfing due to some epileptic paddling by some unknown guys on our raft, Charlie tried his best, thank you. But by the second day the warnings of "You don't want to fall in here, cuz the undercut rocks will kill you," really started to get to me. Yes I made more use of the chicken strap that second day.

Falling in really isn't that bad, it just depends on where you fall in. Most of the time you pop back up and someone grabs you and all is good, but those ominous warnings of "If you fall in here, swim to the.....hmmm, just don't fall in here" weighed on my mind. I am not a great swimmer, and trying to swim with the vest on, the snappy helmet and the paddle, not to mention my extra weight that I carry with me, makes it a real challenge.

Why, do you ask, am I going back then? I must conquer my fear of the New River so that next year, I will have the guts to do the Gauley River and the waterfall. Whay do I want to do that? Well, in some strange way it is actually really fun.

Why am I still writing about the rafting trip? Because it was a life changing event. The drive up was worth gold to me, the first night in the "rustic" cabin was like being at camp. It was great. I wish I could have those experiences more often.

I have done much reflecting and realize that I need to be more like a river. Calm, relaxing, beautiful (haha), steady, reacting, supporting, and sometimes, exciting and wild.

We shall see what happens.

I ordered a what???!!!

2006-06-10T07:28:00.000-04:00

Started our Ladies Bible study, and had a great time. I hope to gain some good insights. I am planning my order a little more carefully now. Think I will make a list, and memorize it, so as not to forget it. Tired of the same old mistakes. They may be fun and exciting, but not very sustaining. Oh, and by the way, no pickles please.

Nachos Bellgrande

2006-06-09T06:26:00.000-04:00

I had a nacho of a day on tuesday. I am diabetic which entails many doctor visits. I misunderstood a message I received from a doctor at the practice that I go to and made an appointment. So I get there and have to wait forever, the dr who called me comes in and literally yells at me that she can't take on anymore patients and didn't I get her message?! Obvious miscommunication, I ask her if we can do blood work anyways since I am there, more grumbling, then she grumbled at the lab folks who were as confused as I was.
Giving blood is not my strong point, I don't mind it just I seem to have no veins. They must stick me several times and the place that works is in my wrists. Kinda strange, but they fed me. They are nice ladies.
More weirdness when it came time to make another appointment, seeing as my regular dr left the practice and the one was crazy or something (maybe she was having a really bad day) so after some discussion, the reccomended dr is on maternity leave, the office lady picked a dr for me. Hope that one works out.
Then glorious lunch, as I had been fasting at this point I was starving. I went to Taco Bell and got my favorite Nachos Bellgrande and a beef burrito. The burrito was great no problems no mess. The nachos, well I never got to eat them. As I opened the package, between my shaking hands and who knows what, they went flying and landed in my lap, in my seat and on the floor. I was sitting in my car and it was horrible. So a quick trip home to change and finally into work.
I am still thinking about those nachos.
I know that many of you have already heard this story, but I needed to get it out and be done with it. I am sure that I could somehow relate it to my struggles as a new Christian, but I am late for work and that will have to come later.

Sunny Days

2006-06-08T06:38:00.000-04:00

Just happened to be looking at some old pics and came across this one. This is January 2005 in Florida. I love this picture. My kids are so trusting that God won't send a huge wave, just little ones to keep them cooled off. I am not sure what they were doing, maybe hoping to get buried in sand, who knows.

Selling Christmas Trees

2006-06-02T17:40:00.000-04:00

Ever have one of those weeks. Well, this has been a doozy. I normally love my job, but this week it was all I could do to work my 32 hours (Holiday Pay covered the other 8). Yesterday I looked at the clock and it was only 1:00 and I had no idea what I was going to do for 3 hours. Of course, I figured out something and stayed busy.

Today wasn't much better, then my boss asked me to do a simple task. Should have taken only an hour or so, hahaha. Four hours later I smiled at him and said woohoo I am done. I get home from work and feel crazy when I walk in the door. Not sure why. :0)

Tonite the Ladies Friday Night Bible Study starts and that should be fun. Then it is a mad dash to get daughter ready for camp next week. Laundry laundry laundry. Hmmm I wonder if we could wash our clothes on the river bank, using rocks to scrub them.

My friend Kelly (she's the best) and I am not just saying that, has this idea. Maybe we could just move to the river for the summer and she could guide one of those rafts, and witness to people. She would have a captive audience. It looks better everyday. We could get a big house, kids(hers and mine) would have some fun, I would still work so that I wouldn't have to be around the kids. Just joking.

Sunday mornings floating on the river, reading scripture would be pretty awesome. Too bad reality kicks in every so often and reminds me that life isn't always fun, but maybe it should be a bit better than it is. Maybe God will direct me in that. I am still waiting for His guidance but I think that I need to work harder at being a Christian before I worry about anything else.

Oh and by the way, next time you buy a Christmas Tree, ask the guy/gal what they do in the summer time.

They Call Me......Sam

2006-05-30T17:22:00.000-04:00

The name Sam came about on my recent whitewater rafting trip with my singles group from church. We made a trip to the New River Gorge, West Virginia, lots of fun jokes there, and spent two days rafting. My wonderful plastic helmet was a bright yellow and someone had been nice enough to put a name tag on the back of it. So Sam I became and seeing as we had to fish people out of the river, fisherman.

Turns out that the boat that I was in had the highest fall-out rate. Our running joke was that any time our river guide said "relax" my friend Kelly fell out. She also spent some time submerged looking for Nemo, or Heaven, whichever came first. Luckily, she found neither and is already planning a Labor Rafting trip.

If you have never been rafting I suggest that you try it at least once. Very wild ride.

Other Stuff

2006-05-29T22:15:00.000-04:00

I was wandering through countless Blog sites and finally decided that if other people can do this then so can I. I am realistic enough to realize that no one will most likely read it, but it is kinda fun. Guess I will take some time to figure it all out tomorow and just use it as my own personal journal. God is Good.

New Christian Struggles

2006-05-29T22:07:00.000-04:00

Help me out and share your walk with Christ. I struggle daily and would like to read some encouraging words.